Answered prayers on the field

One huge blessing and challenge after leaving my job at Warner has been the abundance of time I have to go share the gospel with people on campus. My first year staffing (two years ago) was miserable-- I'd EV by myself for three hours at a time and I was so scared, as well as so guilt-ridden for any time that I passed someone by in fear or dread. Last year, I became busier and I didn't evangelize as much, but it was growing on me and I became more comfortable sharing with people on campus. This year, I didn't get opportunities to EV at all (besides STP/ETP) because I was barely on campus anyway.

That brings us to now. It's been still challenging each time I go out, and I think it takes me an average of 20 minutes to work up the courage to approach someone. Am I just not used to it anymore? Or am I just a coward in desperate need of God's grace? Perhaps both hehe. But every time God gives me the courage to talk to someone, it's a huge blessing.

So today, as I'm walking toward "the field", I lift up a prayer to God. "God, I pray that I'll meet someone who's open to talking about Jesus. God, I pray that I'll meet someone that wants to hear the gospel via the bridge illustration. In Jesus' name, Amen." I walk up to this girl next to the inverted fountain, ask her about her beliefs, and she responds, "I'm not comfortable sharing about this with people. Thanks, though." Rejection. I think I was more on a roll though because I walked up the stairs toward Schoenberg, asked the next girl on a bench, and voila! Praise the Lord, both prayers answered!! 3rd year, Japanese music major who is totally open to talking, really willing to listen to the bridge, really thankful that I shared with her, oh my, God is so good!! She was totally ripe for hearing the gospel and it was all by God's grace. It was such a blessing walking away from that conversation, knowing that my God is watching over me even as I cower in strange fear. I'm not alone out there. :) I encourage you all to join me in asking of the Lord because when He answers, we really do feel His love. He cares for me!

I stand amazed...

God is... amazing. Slightly rebuking, too? But more just amazing, gracious, patient, kind, loving, generous... I know He's getting a kick out of the fact that my last post was about lacking money. All I can do is shake my head and try to understand grace. Within the past week, I've received one anonymous cash donation, two via check, and two monthly pledges, all adding up to a big WOW. I could be a pessimist and say that I still have ~80% to go but it's hard to be a pessimist when you worship such a great God.

Testimonies:

I saw someone on campus that I hadn't seen in a while and I stopped to talk/catch up with what was going on in his life. It was brief, maybe 15-20 minutes, somehow getting on the topic of my moving overseas. Then, very unexpectedly, when he got up to leave, he gave me a check saying, "It's not much but please take this." What?? Only in God's family, in His kingdom. I barely know the guy, perhaps talking with him only a handful of times before this. Incomprehensible.

I found this in my backpack yesterday:

This picture makes me look like a drug dealer. :D sorry. But seriously, I don't even know what to say. Which is why this post is so scattered and disjointed but I figured I have to proclaim His praises.

All I could do every time financial support would come was pray and thank God. I feel so undeserving of people's money. I know, as King David says, all that we have is God's and when we give to Him, we just give back what He first gave us. But the selflessness of people's hearts to want to give of their hard-earned money with the faith that God will provide for them moves me. God bless them.

I also feel affirmed by God. I've been going through doubts as to whether God really wants me to go overseas, but if hearts are being moved to support me in prayer and finances, that must say something. I know that I don't have any "power" nor do I want to have any persuasive role in people's support of me. So yes, I praise God for showing me once again that He can do it and He will. I thank Him because I don't know what I'm doing and everyday it feels crazier that I'd move out of my comfort zone, especially feeling like I lack the gifts/skills to be successful out there-- but He's letting me know that He's leading me, and that's enough.

Sorry again that this post is so disjointed. Thank you for your prayers (ecce, God answers! What joy to know our Heavenly Father hears and answers!). I hope this post brings you to praise God and see Him at work in your own life. Down with our disbelief! :) 3 Cheers for the King!

Money, money, money... (money!)

Thinking about that song on that one show. Very helpful, I know. Anyway, latest prayer update: it could be a possibility that I'll stay in the States longer (instead of going with V-SET, the summer short-term missions trip in late June) if I can't raise at least $20,000 of the 28,000 that I'm hoping for. I guess it makes sense that I'd have to stay in the States if I haven't raised the money, but I' m hoping that I won't have to consider this as an option as it would make logistics much more complicated. (How would I pay for rent? I just left my job, too. What about my parents who are coming from Taiwan to send me off? etc.)

One of God's special ways of revealing Himself to me has always been as a God of provision though. Linda, when we lived together '07-'08 (yay Linda!) brought that to my attention and I realized that from backpack to watch, money for rent to auto insurance, God has always done crazy things.

And my God will meet all your needs according His glorious riches in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)

But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well. (Matthew 6:33)

Lastly the awesome comfort of knowing that God is well-known for answering seemingly impossible problems with seemingly impossible solutions (see II Kings 3:16-20 on a super cool story on how God made water come from nowhere... He's so cool!). Thankful for this challenge of faith, but need prayer to stay trusting and not become frantic.